The golden girls are getting hitched: Jennifer Aniston, Marjorie Taylor Greene and me!

Well-worn ladies rolling the dice for a second (or third) time.

Aniston is among the most famous of Hollywood's repeat brides. She's reportedly conjuring the spirits in the hopes of convincing her blue-eyed, hypnotist boyfriend Jim Curtis to ask for her hand.

Sources told the Daily Mail she's been 'manifesting' a proposal during 'spiritual goddess circle talks,' which apparently involve passing around a bejeweled, be-feathered wooden 'talking stick'.

Weird… but if it works, who are we to judge?

Then there's ex-congressional rodeo clown Marjorie Taylor Greene, who has President Donald Trump to thank (or blame) for her recent marriage to ex-journalist Brian Glenn.

Trump brought these two lovebirds together at a 2022 MAGA rally (before MTG and DJT had their little falling out). The new Mr and Mrs MTG said 'I do' in Sin City on Tuesday and gambled the night away in their wedding frocks.

It's Margie's second whack at the love piñata and Jen's third – and despite the trolls poo-poo'ing these unions, I'm happy to join the girls.

Why do we varsity brides get so much heat for being perennial optimists, looking for love in all the right places?

Jennifer Aniston is reportedly conjuring the spirits in the hopes of convincing her blue-eyed, hypnotist boyfriend Jim Curtis to ask for her hand

The new Mr and Mrs MTG said 'I do' in Sin City on Tuesday and gambled the night away in their wedding frocks

Anyone who finds themselves single in their fifth and sixth decades will tell you romantic prospects can be grim. I dated a few psychopaths (everyone from a real-life Patrick Bateman to a confused Liberace) and brutally refined my bulls**t detector to weed out the idiots who weren't worth my time and affection.

Before I met my fiancé, I had even met with a very expensive matchmaker who wanted $50,000 to set me up on three dates. Sorry folks, but that's some bad math, and I'll admit to feeling pretty defeated when I decided to go it alone.

At one point, I had even resigned myself to romantic solitude, vowing that when my girls had finally left the nest, I'd step off the professional carousel and move into a convent to fill my days milking goats and making soap.

But I never gave up because as a divorced woman in my 50s, I will tell you that I loved being married. Those of us who have been hitched before – even if we didn't find our permanent partners on the first go-round – we know the institution itself is fulfilling and worth pursuing.

Shortly after I'd begun manifesting my farm/nunnery fantasies, I stepped into the elevator with a handsome, flirty stranger with deep blue eyes and a calm fearlessness that I found insanely attractive. We talked a little and a few weeks later found ourselves in another elevator.

He asked for my number and didn't beat around the bush with an agonizing three-day waiting period. (Note to guys: if you're interested, text her right away. Don't play games, especially if it's not your first tournament. Decisive lust is incredibly sexy.)

I stepped into the elevator with a handsome, flirty stranger with deep blue eyes and a calm fearlessness that I found insanely attractive

We talked a little and a few weeks later found ourselves in another elevator. He asked for my number and didn't beat around the bush with an agonizing three-day waiting period

Now, three years later with our children as our attendants, we will roll the dice and walk down the aisle with our closest friends and family cheering us on.

There is so much life that has brought us to this moment between his time in combat and the loss of my father. There have been so many highs and lows along the way. And I can't wait to dive into every new adventure.

When you have tried and failed at wedlock, you have no choice but to take stock of yourself and your choices. Time alone teaches you to be a little more forgiving to yourself and others while pursuing the things that make you truly happy. I also learned that when you get another shot, accept it with humility and gratitude, because a second act can hold the most possibility.

Most importantly, if you've waded through the manure, take that bull by the horns and ride it like a rodeo clown.

Am I right, MTG?